By Mecca Fowler
Editor’s note: The opinions expressed here are those of the authors. View more opinion on ScoonTV.
Kevin Samuels, a polarizing public figure and image consultant, died on May 6th at his Buckhead apartment in Atlanta at the age of 56, according to several sources. Samuels rose to prominence by giving dating and lifestyle advice to listeners who called into his Instagram and YouTube shows. Some have credited his success due to his “toxic” and “misogynistic” opinions. Others have applauded his succinct and straight-to-the-point ability to deliver advice that people may not be ready for.
Samuels, who was twice divorced, provoked a fury of criticism last month on social media by suggesting that unmarried women beyond the age of 35 are “leftover women.” Although this was simply his opinion, it did not stop hit dogs from hollering on social media and emotionally reacting to the things they may not want to hear. Although, it is a realistic take.
Further, the people that Samuels offers advice to are often the ones who call into his show themselves, so they’re already familiar with his style and tone. If they don’t seem to have a problem with his messages and find value in what he has to say, why is the rest of the world melting down over his opinions?
People who have done their research or followed Samuels for a while knew he spoke to both men and women about stepping up their dating life. On many occasions, he spoke about wanting Black men to prioritize themselves so that they could reach the standards of the women they want to date.
His general advice seemed to be that to get the caliber of a relationship that you want, you have to work on yourself and be realistic about your expectations. In other words, take accountability for the part you play in achieving what you want. However, many feminists labeled him as misogynistic, clearly ignoring that he was an equal-opportunity critic.
What became glaringly obvious on social media once the news broke is that there was a gender divide on how Samuels should be remembered. Most men speaking on his death just commended his life and his attempts to get men to better themselves. On the other hand, social media was full of women who happily clamored and hoped for his death to be true before confirmation.
Ironically, the women who cheered for his death and attempted to make his cutthroat advice into a gender war have simply proved Samuels’s point. They tend to exude the type of energy that they would not want reciprocated on to them.
This speaks to a larger problem in society. People do not want to be realistic within the dating world. When we hear of relationships in pop culture and society, they seem very transactional or low vibrational. It seems that people are more focused on getting something out of the other person than getting to know people and being a quality person themselves.
It also seems that this generation of modern women believe that they can date beyond their social status for clout and not have anything to show for it. They want to act however they want, dress however they want, and not be told that they must conform to some of the more traditionally feminine traits that men still desire. They get in their feelings when they are told that type of attitude will not work. It’s the plague of toxic feminism.
These types of women have issues with people even mildly suggesting that they take accountability. The ones who think that because they have a home, career, and degrees that they are above critique. This is why they took offense to anything Samuels said and acted like it was an attack on them personally. They do not like being told about themselves and that is very apparent.
These women do not have the ability to go within themselves. They are superficial and shallow. If it doesn’t apply, let it fly. But the hate mob can’t do that. They go out of their way to talk about how much they “hate” Samuels or his message because they don’t have the capacity to reflect on what he says. Instead, they ultimately end up amplifying his platform to others who do resonate with his messages.
Whatever people think of the man, it is abundantly clear that he was trying to have a commonsense approach to dating in the modern world. That was his job. Whether you believe his harsh critiques were warranted or not is hardly the issue anymore. Samuels was a mirror for people to stop and look and reflect on the inside.
Unfortunately, too many people threw the message out with the messenger because of his curt and straight-to-the-point oratory style.
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